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Delaying Gratification

April 19, 2007
I am all for it, delay gratification that is, not with a patriarchal bent however. In my opinion, delay gratification is what makes the “real” American dream work. I do whole heartily believe delay gratification is necessary to succeed in a perfect democracy, in an ideal (where greed is limited) capitalistic society. Yet, we do not live in a perfect democracy or ideal capitalistic society, not even close. Our society rewards certain people who do not delay gratification and shame others who do not. Coincidently, the former are in power, and the latter are accused of deserving his or her position because of their lack of discipline, determination, —will power to delay their gratification.I read this in an article by Ayala H. Gabriel I am researching on Euripides’ Medea, “Greek drama, according to Freud, is perturbingly revelatory. It unmasks aspects of real life that people are anxious to conceal, deny, and suppress because they are at odds with prevailing ideas.” Or I could paint with a large brush and say, —living the existence of cognitive dissonance.

The good Reverend Matthew Winkler was not having any of that delay gratification rhetoric when he rammed his dick in his wife Mary Winkler’s rectum knowing she was in pain, knowing she was concern about her body’s preservation. “She said he did not stop, that she was concerned that perhaps it would hurt her body…and he made some comment that she could always have surgery to fix it.” No doubt, Rev. Matthew Winkler told members of his flock repeatedly to have patience, to work hard, to wait and they will be rewarded for their delayed gratification, even if that meant waiting until they were in Heaven. I need no proof to know that he preached this doctrine. The very sentiment is so prevalent in our culture only a fool or someone who wants to maintain the status quo would deny its existence.Matthew Winkler could not delay his gratification and wait for the orgasmic rewards that come with knowing that one’s family is happy, one’s children are all grown up, are happy, possibly educated and doing well. He could not wait to feel the satisfaction in knowing that being there as a member of a community, part of, helped others survive a crisis, persevere, or succeed in this wretched world. No, he could not bother with any of that.

The rules do not apply to patriarchs. No, he wanted to feel instantly the drunkenness of power. He was determined to make that very moment of his pounding intrusive insertion gratifying. Welcome consent is not gratifying. Consent has no sport. Sacking and plundering is a real man’s sportsmanship. By God, it was his right simply for being born white and male in America. He wanted to revel in the glory of hurting a woman, his wife. He wanted to experience the power of sexually dominating, raping someone who relied on him for emotional and financial support. Her pain, her request for him to stop, the expense of surgery, doctors hi-fiving over her anesthetized body, nothing mattered at that very moment he was ramming his dick in her rectum but what he wanted, and what he desired.

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