It has been raining around here lately. Traffic has been uneventful other than the usual suspects and their driving antics.
I did notice today that when I take issue with other drivers it is usually in the form of saying aloud to myself, “What an idiot!” The insult is framed in a “you are an idiot” vs. “I’m not because I’m the best driver of all time!” That way I can feel smug and superior. We all need our little moments of superiority to help tackle our lives. However, for some reason when the idiot driver is turning and happens to be a slow turner, I become them, and say aloud what I suspect their internal dialogue must be while making the turn. My daughter sits in the back seat laughing the whole time.
Here is the projected internal dialogue of a slow driver/turner that I am usually stuck behind (and believe me I’m not in a rush and they are still slow!):
“I’m going to turn. I have my blinker on. Look at me. I’m going to turn. I’m braking. Okay, I’m turning. I’m swinging out. I’m turning I tell you. I’m turning. I’m swinging in now. I’m letting off the brakes. Oh no, now I’m pressing the brakes. I’m cutting the steering wheel sharp. I’m turning. Don’t make me do it! I’m going to do it! I’m now doing it! I’m turning. Here I go. I’m doing it. I’m turning…..I’m.turning…….I’m turning….turning…………turning…