The Famous Old Hat: Short Hair Means What?
My oldest daughter, what was it that I decided to name her here, oh yeah, Fleur, my oldest daughter Fleur has been suffering all summer with the desire to cut off her hair. It has been a hot summer, long too. Usually I look forward to the fall, for the decorations mostly, but this year it seems that time is flying by too fast. Last week, one night, well past midnight, Fleur decided to go for it and cut off her hair. All of it. Now, she was rational about it. None of this psycho woman staring in the mirror applying too much make-up and heavy lipstick painted on outside of her lips that Hollywood movies like to portray as the modi operandi of emotionally disturbed women. No, the thought had been brewing all summer. She was waiting until she had extra cash for a hairdresser but could not wait any longer. With some scissors, she cut it all off, leaving barely an inch. Initially she had no doubt. She loved it. Then she went out in the world. The world breathlessly exclaimed, “What happened to your hair, all of your hair, your lovely hair.” As if it would never grow back. As if her hair made her human. We are talking human at this point because as of then no one threw in her sex as a reason to mourn the lost hair.
However, word travels fast. My mother, her grandmamma had to see this nonsense for herself. Keep in mind that my daughter has a fetus/baby growing inside of her body right now. A baby, if all things go well she will be born on/around Edna St. Vincent Millay’s birthday. Everyone knows Fleur is having a baby. Everyone knows that Fleur’s fetus/baby was conceived the conventional heterosexual way. There is no doubt that Fleur is a female and performs as heterosexual females are expected to in a patriarchy. Well, to a certain degree. There is hope for her yet. So imagine the child’s shock when her grandmamma started screaming at her, “YOUR HAIR, YOUR HAIR WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO YOUR HAIR!” There was a feeble attempt at defending herself met with the screaming grandmamma’s final retort, “BUT YOU ARE A GIRLLLLLLLL!” As if the child betrayed all of humankind by chopping off her hair. And it is not as if she hasn’t cut her hair off before. It is not as if I haven’t cut all of my hair off before, actually many times before. Seriously. “BUT YOU ARE A GIRLLLLLLLLLLLLL!”