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Open Thread 42 “The Meaning of Life”

February 5, 2010

35 Comments
  1. February 5, 2010 3:06 pm

    This year is already so much better than last year. I had resigned myself to boredom and drudgery, and I never even dared to hope I might ever actually have a modicum of happiness. Everything is so different now. Life’s fickleness has really been kind to me recently, including the part where I’ve discovered the best chocolate-covered coffee beans I’ve ever had. Most of the others I’ve had have used espresso beans that were much too hard and bitter for my taste. But these new ones I could eat by the bushel. The coffee bean is light and crisp, and the chocolate is creamy but not too sweet.

    • February 5, 2010 4:31 pm

      Ooooh, I need to try those. I’ve been getting bored with my beans as well. And I agree, this year is already better. I didn’t realize it until 2009 was coming to a close, but I was getting so over 2009.

  2. Soulsis permalink
    February 5, 2010 6:30 pm

    Are them beans magic? So far this year I have only been more reminded of how very black and female I am. This year has sucked royally. Family and friends in Haiti dead and now a white woman professor wants to discuss my tone with me because a gay male in class cried oppression after he attacked me and basically blamed all of prop 8 on blacks, while taking special care to make me hold up the weight of the race for that decision. I never ONCE called his sorry ass a racist, and yet I get accused of doing so. TRUST ME, if I’m gonna call u a racist, I will do so out right. You won’t have to guess. So him saying blacks deserve more criticism because we should know better than anyone else what oppression is like, as a gay white male, is fine. Me saying that is problematic and WRONG = mean ol blackie bashing a gay dude. URGH.

    And I am desperately trying to get OUT of this class, but alas no luck as there aren’t many other classes open at this point.

    So yeah, I could use some magic beans. If not to get rid of the racists in my life, at least to bring some joy to the surviving members of my circle in Haiti.

    (pitty party over)

    • February 5, 2010 6:57 pm

      He is a male, a white one at that. Bastard. The academic environment is a fucking joke. It is just a place where white people want to pretend they are above it all when they are in fact wallowing in privilege and their racism. He needs to present how many register voters in California are black. And out of those, how many actually voted. If that number is not greater than the number of people who voted for Prop 8, then it is mathematically impossible for it to be the fault of black voters. Nevertheless, registered voters or not, there is no way blacks were responsible for voting Yes on 8. There is not a big enough percentage of blacks in California to outnumber the white voters of Yes on 8. Crackers and raving Papists (check how many of those California has) voted Yes on 8. Therefore, he can go fuck himself. Also, it is racist as hell to put the responsible/accountability on the shoulders of the most oppressed group. His ass needed to get out and round up some votes instead of expecting his “servants” to do the heavy lifting for him.

      Racial and ancestral makeup:

      According to the 2006–2008 American Community Survey, California’s population is:

      * 42.3% White (not including White Hispanic)(very possibly raving papists)
      * 36.6% are Hispanic or Latino (of any race) (very possibly raving papists)
      * 12.5% Asian
      * 6.7% Black or African American
      * 2.6% Multiracial
      * 1.2% American Indian

    • Soulsis permalink
      February 5, 2010 7:14 pm

      Thank you Kitty. I am just fuckin tired of having to fight off crazy ass white people. I’m tired of always being viewed through their racist eyes as the “angry black woman.” This boy wouldn’t know me if I spit at him, but knows that I “look for racism where there is none” and it has pissed me off and drained me. And the goddamn teacher wants to talk to ME about MY tone when I refused to tolerate HIS racism!

      So when she and I meet today I will present this racial make up to her, because no doubt she will accuse me of “race baiting” she just doesn’t want to do it on paper. She specifically asked for a phone call… interesting.

      I need to get the hell out of this class, like yesterday.

      And you have a bunch of white people, who are completely ignorant to racism even those who CLAIM to be “aware,” that wont/cant see this for what it is. I feel beaten down really. If not for the fact that bw will make pennies without an education, I’d just say fuck it all. This entire experience has been more work than it’s worth, in all honesty. I gues I should just shut up and endure his racist ranting and abuse and not say it’s wrong, or that I won’t take it. Because doing so has the professor on my ass. Poor gay white male you, “mean” black woman didn’t take your racist shit. UGH.

    • joankelly6000 permalink
      February 5, 2010 9:58 pm

      jesus, soulsis, I’m so sorry you’re dealing with all of that horribleness, and so sad to hear about your family and friends in Haiti. I had seen you write about your fears in the aftermath of the quake, but I didn’t realize – though of course I realized it was a high probability, given the situation – that you’d found out definitively about losses. I wish I could give you more than an imaginary hug through the internet.

      That male in your class, god that is fucking enraging. Kitty’s comment also reiterates the actual FACTS that I had seen, the math of it, broken down (I can’t remember which blogger right now) after the election and the white gay attacks on black California voters began.

      I hate that fucking whine, that “well you should know BETTER because you’re oppressed too!” – his fucking ass is gay, yet he clearly doesn’t fucking “know better,” so he should shut the fuck up on that basis alone. All the other ways he’s full of shit – including accusing YOU of being the oppressor (!) when you respond to his fucking racist ATTACK – is just too fucking much. No fucking wonder you feel beaten down. It’s a horrible, unfair, evil situation. I’ll keep my fingers crossed that at the very least, you can get into a less horrible class. That still leaves those fuckers to keep on being their ugly racist selves, but it shouldn’t all be on your shoulders to confront and deal with that shit by yourself anyway. Ugh is fucking right. xoxox

    • soulsistasoulja permalink
      February 6, 2010 1:47 am

      Joan quite a few ppl are lost. I just try not to think about it. So many friends, and family just gone, and so many racist fucked up white ppl bitching on and on about the “looting” and the “danger” and how “animal like” Haitian people are. I don’t talk about it much… I can’t.

      Thank you for the support though and for the cyber hug. This week has been quite a doozy.

      Talked to my professor about this. She blamed me, of course, for not care-taking the whining boy. FUCK HIM! I used “strong language,” I “took what he said out of context,” I “called him a bigot.” YOU GODDAMN RIGHT I DID. He said he felt that black people should be criticized MORE for the prop 8 because we should know better. But hey, that’s not bigotry because ya know he didn’t call us niggers! OMFG white people and this damn boogyman vision of what it means to be racist and bigoted!

      Yeah I was wrong to say I wouldn’t tolerate him twisting my words, superimposing shit into what I said and all that rot. It was wrong of me to set a goddamn boundary and to let him know not to dare cross it!

      I have to decide FAST whether or not to keep this class or go to another one. The other one throws a huge problem into my schedule, but is it right to have to deal with a racist class mate and his racism apologizing white professor, or should I have to completely re-work my schedule to get the fuck out of there?

      Stay tuned?

    • February 6, 2010 1:18 am

      TRUST ME, if I’m gonna call u a racist, I will do so out right.

      Soulsis, something I have learned is that we’re not even allowed to *think* a white person is racist. Not only are we not to actually say it (which really sends them over the edge), if they catch an inkling that we’re thinking it but just holding it in, they *always* accuse you of having spoken the words. It’s somehow never considered “polite” or “peacekeeping” for you to just sit there musing their racism over in your own mind without actually calling them racists. You have to completely shut your mind down in order to satisfy them.

    • February 6, 2010 1:33 am

      Also, I have, of course, like you and any other black woman who’s ever dared to speak up, had the exact same experience you describe offline, where I’ve pointed out why a particular statement or conversational trajectory is racist and been penalized for pointing it out, while the originators of the racist statement/train of thought, are made out to be victims of my “over-sensitivity.” (And, amazing that in any other context the supposedly “over-sensitive” are considered weak, but as soon as it’s to do with race, the “over-sensitive” are suddenly so powerful as to victimize white folks.) So, despite what some stupid people might think, the racism of the white women online isn’t just some online phenomenon unique only to me personally in interactions with these particular white women. The exact same scenarios play themselves out no matter what the setting, and no matter what the sex of the racist white person. The pattern is universal, including the attempts to bring whatever right-thinking white people may be in the vicinity over to the side of the racists.

    • soulsistasoulja permalink
      February 6, 2010 1:58 am

      And this is why non white identified women of color have such an issue with racist white feminists! Because they REINFORCE this shit and bring it into a movement that allegedly exists to liberate all women, not just white women. This goes back to what we were saying here the other day about white women playing the role of prison guard for daddy patriarchy! They’re oppressing woc with their fucked up racism, then claiming WE’RE doing the oppressing by holding them accountable for it! It’s fuckin mind blowing, isn’t it? And it’s enraging.

      “why do black women pick on white feminists?” We’re not picking on you silly ppl, we’re standing up for ourselves and our own goddamn liberation in this sham of a movement you claim exists to liberate us! Can people really be that damn dense?

      I guess so.

      But good point, Margie, about even thinking about racism. What he said is racist, the views he holds are racist and he is hiding behind being gay to avoid being held accountable for it. Sounds to me just like the white women claiming to be feminist. “Oh I cannot be an oppressive racist to woc, I’m a woman. I have no power, I’m a marginalized person too! So what if white men look at me and bond with me over our shared whiteness, so what if I have access to white privilege. I use my white privilege to help woc, I couldn’t possibly be a fuckin racist jerk.”

  3. February 5, 2010 7:11 pm

    Am I to understand that John Edwards wanted to be the next president of the United and willingly made a sex tape?

    I am surprised his people did not kill her. You know, like that gay choir director who was murdered. I am still quite sure he was doing the nasty with our sitting president.

    • Soulsis permalink
      February 5, 2010 7:15 pm

      LMBAO!

      I needed that! John Edwards is a joke…

    • February 5, 2010 7:21 pm

      It is just pure arrogance. “Oh, set that camera up so I can get an awesome tape of you and me doing the nasty. I don’t ever have to worry about it becoming pubic, because I am GOD! Everyone will protect me!”

      WTF?

    • Soulsis permalink
      February 5, 2010 7:22 pm

      It’s really funny! I mean, all things considered!

  4. February 5, 2010 11:40 pm

    (((((soulsis)))))

    Gosh, I am so sorry about your friends and family in Haiti.

    This gay white dude sounds like a real arsehole. It’s like he’s just sorry to not have the full privilege of a straight white dude more than anything else. And you’re being spoken to about it? This is the kind of thing that makes me wonder if punching holes in the wall is as cathartic as men make it out to be. It probably isn’t. It probably isn’t. It probably isn’t.

    • soulsistasoulja permalink
      February 6, 2010 2:03 am

      I have hijacked this thread… Sorry Ladies. Better stop before I’m accused of narcissism. *smirk*

      Thank you Valerie. And I think you’re absolutely right about homedude.

    • February 6, 2010 10:24 am

      ((((Soulsis)))))

      Sounds like they will do anything to invisibilise racism. Ideally I guess they’d like you to think it doesn’t even exist at all, and every time you see or hear or feel it, it’s just a product of your overheated imagination. Good way to make people feel like they’re losing their minds, a basic favoured tactic of abusers and controllers everywhere.

  5. Mary Sunshine permalink
    February 6, 2010 12:10 am

    These days, I find the meaning of life in entropy.

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Entropy

    • February 6, 2010 1:35 am

      Mary, that is depressing.

    • Mary Sunshine permalink
      February 6, 2010 3:49 am

      Well … I found out what entropy was when I was 11 years old, and I’ve been depressed ever since.

      Which is why I love chocolate coated coffee beans. If entropy is really having its way with you, just eat raw French roast coffee beans while simultaneously taking a bite of unsweetened chocolate. Ah, the illusion of having defeated entropy, if only temporarily.

      It was the chocolate coffee bean vision that got me thinking about entropy as the Meaning Of Life.

    • February 6, 2010 4:04 am

      I hadn’t thought about entropy since I was in a statics class in college, and I guess I was so different a mindspace than I’m in now that I never thought to apply it to social phenomena as well as physical ones.

    • soulsistasoulja permalink
      February 6, 2010 2:01 am

      It really is… 😦

  6. polly permalink
    February 7, 2010 4:47 pm

    HI Margie and Kitty, I would be grateful if you could publish this as a security announcement for others. I just approved a comment on my blog which had gone into spam and ended up being hit with some kind of file sharing programme from ‘underworld’. Just a warning to other bloggers out there. Do not approve any comments which have been spammed and be extra cautious.

  7. February 8, 2010 5:11 pm

    Get hit in the head with a brick or go to the DMV?

  8. joankelly6000 permalink
    February 8, 2010 7:02 pm

    DMV! but only if you make an appointment. I just had to go to renew my license (new photo required, boo) and it wasn’t bad at all honestly.

  9. February 10, 2010 5:27 am

    I’ve been so busy this week, and the rest does not look much lighter. However, I want to take a minute to make a bet. I bet you cannot say totes more than I can!

    totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes
    totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes
    totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes
    totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes
    totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes
    totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes
    totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes
    totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes
    totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes
    totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes
    totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes

    totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes

    Can I like totes get that approval for making up netspeak. Because I am like totes so in need of kewl points.

    If you cannot totes like put totes in every comment you make then you so totes don’t need to be reading our blog. Totes.

    totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes
    totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes
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    totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes totes

    • soulsistasoulja permalink
      February 12, 2010 1:31 am

      This is funny as all hell! omfg

  10. atheistwoman permalink
    February 10, 2010 2:47 pm

    Kitty you are totes funny. ;-).

  11. soulsistasoulja permalink
    February 12, 2010 1:30 am

    Misogynist cab driver complains about “women drivers” because a woman sat at a red light and did the legal thing, ya know NOT running the damn light. GASP. He jumps a curb, and attempts some type of u turn merge thing that nearly got us all killed. My friend is friggin scared outta her mind and I, the one with no good sense, say “oh yah fuckin woman drivers, how dare she stop at that red light and prevent you from crashing the GODDAMN CAR into that truck with ur crazy fucked up attempt at showing HER how it’s done!!! yay!” He looks at me, mutters something about black women which he does NOT repeat when challenged and starts to drive like someone with some goddamn sense.

    I’m so totes a badass! And I’m smart and SEXXXXY.

    (just threw up in my mouth a little)

  12. February 12, 2010 1:43 pm

    …and I’m cold.

  13. Mary Sunshine permalink
    February 12, 2010 1:57 pm

    Hi Kitty!

    I’ll be cold with you.

    There’s snow on the ground here.

  14. soulsis permalink
    February 12, 2010 8:28 pm

    Still feelin sick from that post… totes not well.

    Its totes not cold. Well it could be worse. Naw the chill is present but it ain’t the weather!

  15. Soulsis permalink
    February 24, 2010 5:45 am

    sorry to just post this like that but I just got an email from my friend with this shit. omfg what is WRONG with people?

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