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In Response to Bullshit

January 7, 2011

First of all, Valerie, and I know you’re reading this, I didn’t want you quoting me at that tranny mag, not because I “stole” something from Bev Jo (what I said in that quote, if I remember correctly was mostly about bisexuals running off to tell their boyfriends about their lesbian escapades – and anyone who’s been reading my blog for any length of time, which you have, knows that I have entirely credited Bev for her specific analysis of lifelong lesbian oppression – wherever and whenever I’ve brought it up publicly – and have done so ever since Mary Sunshine recommended her book to me; that doesn’t, however, mean that I owe the authors of that book anything more than that), but because I didn’t want to be associated with your writing at that tranny rag.  It didn’t sit well with me, and if you’d told me from the beginning that you were asking for input for an article on a tranny rag, I would have told you up front that I wasn’t interested in giving it.  But you didn’t.  You lied.

Second of all, no, I’m not in the same position as a woman who got married to a man.  Period. And I’m certainly not in the same position as a woman who deliberately got pregnant and bore her husband’s son as a white woman living in an industrialized nation at the ripe age of at least 35.  So, no I don’t have as much heterosexual privilege as Valerie.  We’re not talking about some poor girl-child sold off into marriage at 10 years old who never had any choice about getting pregnant and having kids.  We’re talking about a nearly middle-aged woman choosing to marry to bear a kid, after a string of however many boyfriends.  So, no, that is nothing like my circumstances.  And it’s not relevant to the circumstances of any currently married woman who’s not calling herself a lesbian.  And according to Dykes-Loving-Dykes, I’m not the only woman who sees it that way.

Third of all, has anyone asked TBL recently whether or not she is sexually attracted to women?

And, finally, Valerie started her blog because she figured she’d be the One Good White Woman who’d provide a “safe space” for black feminists/lesbians (this, after TBL decided to take a step back to re-evaluate the same compulsion in herself).  This lie that it was a coming out blog is just that – a lie.  It’s revisionist history.

I’d managed to refrain from reading any of that nonsense for the past several weeks, but a recent email exchange made me decide to go see exactly what was going on.  I can’t say I’m surprised, but, wow, people really will say *anything* to take a swipe at me.

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